Friday, October 21, 2011


I've been in a bit of a rut this past year. Finding the energy and motivation to get things accomplished has been a challenge to say the least. Unfortunately, I am not the type of person who pours themselves into projects and busy work in an effort to take their mind off of bad times. No, I am the type of person who is basically crippled by it and I shut down. I envy those on the other side. Instead, I wallow in it, and the more things I have on my to-do list, the less I do. And the less I do, the more depressed and upset I get with myself for falling so far behind. It's a vicious cycle. It's a cycle I'm determined to break though. My last brief but intense relationship fell apart, in part, because of this lack of motivation and drive I've been experiencing. There were obviously other reasons for it not working out, but this one in particular is something I don't want to be an issue next time around. And next time around, I've decided, is not going to be for a while. Not until I learn how to be motivated, organized and comfortable with being alone. I want to be ready and baggage free next time.

In an effort to break this cycle, I've been making lists, doing a little bit at a time and trying to figure out a system that works for me. At the beginning of the month I decided that I need some time off of work. I haven't taken a real vacation from work in as long as I can remember and I think I deserve it. So tomorrow I start my week vacation and I'm not going anywhere. Instead I've decided to stay at home and do some serious work on my house. I've enlisted the help of my awesome parents and I've made an impossibly long list of things I want to get accomplished. I'm realistic enough to know that I won't get it all done, but it's a start and I'm excited. Here's my list.

  • Put a new roof on the garage
  • Weed and plant the front yard
  • Paint my bedroom and the living room (choose paint colors)
  • Sew curtains for the kitchen
  • Design the backyard landscape
  • Clean up the vegetable garden area (possibly buy wood from the guy down the street for raised planters)
  • Plant my two grape plants
  • Organize my paperwork
Wish us luck.


  1. I can certainly pull weeds. That's one of my specialties. And I will bring my sewing machine. And I LOVE to offer advice ;)

  2. Good luck! I wish I could take the week off to come work on your house, too. Weeding sounds way better than sitting at a computer.